The advent of social media brought hope that relationships could be formed and strengthened irrespective of geographical limitations. Yet the opposite has proved true. Modern culture is experiencing an epidemic of loneliness, as polls show that nearly 80% of Gen Z reported feelings of loneliness in 2024.
Pope Leo XIV recently said that society has become ill due to a “bulimia” of social media connections. What could be the cure?
Be present.
The Pope grounded his warning on this generation’s sick subjugation to social media with the New Testament story of Christ healing the deaf and mute man in Mark 7. One can only imagine the suffering and isolation of a man who lived all his life in utter silence, incapable of expressing his thoughts and emotions. Though not intuitive, his position mirrors that of modern man.
We enjoy unlimited means of communication, but just as the deaf man had ears and a tongue, possessing the tools to communicate is not the same as possessing the ability. The man’s physical traits did nothing to change the fact that he was deprived of human connection.
The Pope’s harrowing description of social media as “bulimia” offers a vivid and accurate diagnosis of society’s current ills. When one suffers from bulimia, they engage in bouts of overeating, followed by self-induced vomiting. They enjoy the pleasure of eating without its nourishment. Similarly, social media overconsumers gluttonously take in images, videos, and information. It becomes difficult to identify fact from fiction, and a world filled with blaring noise becomes indistinguishable from dead silence. No matter one’s efforts to speak into the void, the many competing voices render him unheard. Such an environment can overwhelm users, increasing their desire to withdraw.
Even our relationships are mediated through this exhausting space. We long to escape it, yet we fear disconnection. Social media offers the illusion of closeness, the ability to maintain relationships with minimal effort, and to form new ones in an instant. Yet just as one can connect in an instant, they can just as easily ignore, disappear, or ghost a former connection. Some cut off communication because they forget to reply or do not prioritize digital messaging. But others simply lose interest, finding it easier to ignore than to have a difficult conversation.
The result can be devastating. The recipient is left with uncertainty, confusion, and feelings of abandonment and unwantedness. We do not ignore things that we love or hate, but we do ignore things to which we are indifferent. When we ignore or neglect others, we tell them that they are not worth our time or attention. Should one drown in the ocean of online “connections,” one is likely to be more frequently ignored and unknown. In which case, one becomes like the blind and deaf man in the Gospel, isolated and incapable of communication.
What is to be done?
The answer is found in the manner in which Christ heals the blind and deaf man. Jesus could have easily said, “Be healed,” and the man would have been healed – but he did more than that. He took the man away from the crowd, touched his tongue, and said, “Be opened.”
Pope Leo observed that it could be as if Christ said, “Be opened to this world that frightens you! Be opened to the relationships that have disappointed you! Be opened to the life you have given up facing!”
In pulling the man away from the crowd and giving him His undivided attention, Jesus healed the wounds of his isolation. Christ healed the man who was closed off to the world by being present with him, and we are called to do the same.
Our attention is so divided by our hyperconnectivity that we don’t develop deep relationships. We tend to either neglect or grow bored with the relationships in front of us. We’ve gorged ourselves with social media connections to the point of vomiting, where we’re left malnourished and weak in the presence of others than before. The solution is not to abandon online connectivity, but to be intentional about it in two ways.
First, be conscious of who one follows and why. If the connection does not solidify an already real and legitimate relationship, remove it. If the communication doesn’t nourish you, as God’s word does, remove it.
Second, take time to reach out to friends, and when people reach out to you, respond. Love others by demonstrating that they are worth your time. In your day-to-day life, put away the distractions and give your full attention to those in front of you.
The simplest form of affection is attention, so the easiest way to love is to be present.
